Dealing with ‘bosses who bully’ at the workplace, which is a HR Headache; learn how to recover from the workplace conflict.

About this event

Dealing with ‘bosses who bully’ at the workplace, which is a HR Headache; learn how to recover from the workplace conflict.

Workshop on how to deal with abrasive workplace behaviours.

Dealing with ‘bosses who bully’ is an HR headache and they rarely respond to feedback. The assumption is that you need to either tolerate their behaviour or fire them: both undesirable options, especially when they are high performers in all other ways. The good news is that there is a third way: that with specialist coaching - Boss Whispering - they can be persuaded and helped to change.

Boss Whispering has been widely used in the S&P500 in America for over 30 years but is new here. It has an 83% success rate. In this workshop, Stephen will outline the principles and best practices used in Boss Whispering that members can then apply when dealing with this tricky HR issue.

The second half will look at how to help colleagues recover from receiving abrasive behaviour. The solution lies, surprisingly, in letting go of resentment - known as forgiveness. The workshop will explain why resentment is so harmful for recovery. It will then show how letting go can bring many benefits and will address the many misconceptions around forgiveness.

Together, these twin approaches rehabilitate individuals, enhance performance, and reduce workplace risks.


Attendees can expect to learn:

  • the impact of abrasive behaviour on culture, retention and psychological safety
  • an understanding of how abrasive leaders can be persuaded to change their behaviour.
  • how to support managers of abrasive leaders to intervene about problematic behaviour
  • an understanding of the common personality features of abrasive leaders and how these can be harnessed to persuade them to want to change.
  • why people can be so slow to recover from bullying and workplace conflict, and the impact of this on performance
  • the harm that resentment does, how forgiveness helps, and addressing the myths around forgiveness.
  • different tools to help people forgive.


About the speaker

Stephen Tolfree

Stephen Tolfree specialises in rehabilitating people after workplace conflict and lectures internationally on this. He is a Boss Whisperer: helping abrasive leaders to change their behaviour and lead with empathy rather than aggression. This approach works particularly well with leaders who are resistant to feedback. He also helps people recover from bullying and other forms of mistreatment, using forgiveness. The impact of this work is being studied by two universities. Stephen is a qualified and accredited executive coach and has coached more than 1000 people.


Please note:

  • Participants will receive their joining details 24 hours before the webinar, along with a reminder 30 minutes before the session begins.
  • The session may be recorded and shared afterwards.
  • The chat function will be used to engage with participants.
  • If there is an external speaker, their views will be their own and may not necessarily reflect those of the CIPD.
  • If any reasonable adjustments are required, participants are encouraged to make this known and assistance will be provided.